Dr. Debra Laino

How To Reignite Your Relationship

 

Five Easy Ways To Reignite Your Passion

There is an old myth that says, “Once your married the sex stops!”  This myth also moves its way into longer-term relationships.  A myth for so many reasons and perhaps a reality for many, the truth is that this doesn’t have to happen. And, there are logical reasons why passion and sexual activity starts to dwindle.  The main reason is forgetting the simple concept of maintenance.

 

Whether you want to accept it or not once you obtain your relationship it is imperative to maintain the relationship.  Maintaining the relationship is on several levels such as good communication, emotional bonding, and sexual bonding-all, which keep, trust high.  However, often sex and passion are weighed in heavy and the other is forgotten about.  Maintained sexual activity and passion begin with good communication and emotional bonding.

 

Here are five easy things you can do to reignite your sex life!

 Emotional Support

Emotional support goes a long way.  Women specifically like to feel connected and acknowledged.  This is at the core of women wanting to have sex and be passionate with their partner.  Be more emotionally connected and she will want to be more physically connected.  If you do not know how to do this then start off with simply just listening to her.  Do not try to solve her problems but acknowledge that she is feeling the way she is.  Simply state “can I do anything to help you feel better?”

Touch

Touch is always a big part of a healthy passionate relationship.  Yet so much of the time we forget how to touch our partners.  Start off with a massage to begin the process of reigniting.  Then make sure you are making touching your partner a priority.  Humans get so much from touch but most importantly they get a barrage of neurochemicals like endorphins and oxytocin.  Endorphins make people feel good and oxytocin bonds people together.

Novelty

New experiences are rated high on the re-ignition of passion.  Every time you and your partner do something new you create new neural pathways.  This helps to create memories as well as helps to continually bond you and your partner.  This doesn’t take money necessarily either.  This can be something as simple of creating a picnic dinner with wine and candles in the living room.

Experiment/Sharpen your skills

Experimenting and sharpening your skills can be with behavior such as communication or in the bedroom.  Experiment with different positions, toys, styles and whatever else you and your partner agree to.  This creates novelty so these two work hand in hand!  One such example is often times men do not want to experiment with sex toys on their own body.  Many men report a great feeling when using a vibrator on their inner thighs and on their testicles.  Yet so many men will not experiment with this.  This type of experimentation sharpens skill in the “bedroom” because you become much more aware of what is pleasurable to you in different ways.  Just like you she likes experimentation too!

Date

Something I often see is that couples forget to date.  Not going out to dinner (which can become monotonous) but rather getting dressed up once a week or once a month and actually going out on a date.  Finding things your partner will enjoy and the two of you will have a great time doing.  I usually like partners to alternate.  You plan one date night and your partner plans the next one.  This way we deal with any issue around initiation.  This works very well to get the passion going again!!

Ciao,

DD